Phillip B’s shampoo

The active ingredient in Philip B’s “Russian Imperial Amber Shampoo”, which retails at $72.95 for a twelve-ounce jar, is sodium laureth sulfate. That’s the same active ingredient in almost every other shampoo, most of which sell for three or five bucks at the drugstore.

Also, it refers to itself as “Opulent & Rejuvenating”, which is how you might describe a white-gloved butler giving you CPR.