31 December, 2015
When you’re shopping for dead squirrels, it’s tempting to go for the classic Old West cowboy squirrel, with his hat and tiny revolver. A mid-level dead-squirrel enthusiast might go for the hunter squirrel, decked out in orange vest and rifle. But the true treasure of dead squirrels is the Canoe Squirrel, rowing down the river of Eternity with his proportionately-sized paddle and craft. Just a passenger on the ship of life, like all of us, except dead, and full of polyester stuffing, with no eyeballs, and glass beads sewn beneath the skin to give the appearance of life.