Monthly Archives: September 2021

Sushi Bazooka

sushi-bazooka

A great idea in theory, and a perfect way to get America interested in sushi, the Sushi Bazooka unfortunately fails in its execution. According to reviews, it breaks easily, is hard to clean, and the rice sticks to the inside. And, personally speaking, it’s a disappointment that you can’t use it to destroy a tank.

If you’re hell-bent on making sushi at home, this set of wooden utensils and bamboo mats would probably do the trick, for under ten bucks. Just make sure you get some decent seaweed to roll them bad boys up. You cheap out there, you’re gonna notice.

The Hashtag

octothorpe-hashtag

It’s still an octothorpe, and it’s also a hashtag. This is how language works, unfortunately, t-shirt.

sharp-hashtag-mug

It’s a sharp symbol in musical notation, mug, and also an octothorpe, and also a hashtag.

pound-sign-shirt

You know where I’m going with this by now. Prescriptivism (the insistence that language is static, and changes to it are necessarily incorrect) is a way of expressing that you’d prefer the world to use the English you grew up with, when televisions were squares with rounded, heavy screens, and our telephones were connected to the wall, and cars burned lead. Our complex descriptors inevitably slide towards expressing a binary of good and bad, and the only way to combat this is to keep language evolving.

Put another way, “<<<<< not mood.”

What Do You Meme? The Game

what-do-you-meme

The best thing about What Do You Meme is how clearly it shows that capitalizing on “memes,” as they exist in culture, are like capturing a fart in a jar. By the time you can close the lid, it’s gone. No matter how fast you grab stolen pictures and bits of writing from your computer, anything you commit to cardstock will necessarily be dated, a reminder of years past rather than a celebration of contemporary culture. The seal and his neck fat, the baby clenching his fist, the fffffffuuuu guy, all long gone.

Then again, maybe that face when you find out girls poop.






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Contact drew at drew@toothpastefordinner.com or tweet him @TWTFSale.