Monthly Archives: March 2015

Only Lemon Starburst


Maybe lemon’s your favorite flavor of Starburst. But do you need an entire pound of it, picked out of multi-flavor bags by some unknown person, repackaged for your gluttonous candy-habit?

No. Obviously not. You need a pound of Just Strawberry Starburst, which is six dollars more than the lemon, for obvious reasons.

Nude Real Estate


From the sordid world of “The Learning Channel” comes this gem, a pay-to-stream TV show called “Buying Naked.” It’s exactly what it sounds like, which is to say: It’s up to Jackie Youngblood, nudist real estate expert, to help this couple find a home that’s both nude and dog friendly.

Guns Are My Family


In a world of stick-figure-stickers, there are thousands of variations and parodies, each worse than the last. But I feel none match the tone of this particular one, whose official title is “Auto Sticker-Funny Car Sticker-Gun Family-Stick Family Decal-Window Sticker-Sticker Decal-Window Decal-Car Decals-Vehicle Sticker.”

If I had to put one in second place, it would probably be the “I Will Literally Murder Your Family With Guns” stick-figure sticker.

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