Monthly Archives: September 2015

The $49 Tablet No One Wants

amazon-fire-tablet

You know you fucked up in the tablet game when you’ve gotta price them at $49.99. But Amazon has taken a further bizarre step, offering SIX-PACKS of the 7″ Fire tablet for $249. Hey, at least you can enjoy the best-selling game Game Of War – Fire Age, which you may have been predatorily redirected to when viewing this very page on mobile. (Sorry about that, by the way. We’re working on it.)

Home Insemination Kit

 

home-insemination-kit

It’s not that this wouldn’t work, necessarily. All the miracle of life usually needs is a little of the right fluid in the right place and time. But if you’re going the syringe-and-speculum route, you might want a more sterile environment than someone’s couch.

Of course, artificial insemination is a technique used on farm or show animals, so it’s nice that similar kits brand themselves as Human Artificial Insemination Kits. The worst way to accomplish this medically-necessary task, though, was suggested by someone in the comments: a six-pack of Tenga Eggs and a way to move your material from point A to point B.






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Contact drew at drew@toothpastefordinner.com or tweet him @TWTFSale.