Mommee Coffee

Pregnant women are one of the most coveted demographics for capitalists. You will ruin your child’s entire life forever if you don’t buy the right products while pregnant, and there’s no better driver of commerce than fear. Enter Mommee Coffee, the pregnant woman’s coffee. Sure, you could drink regular decaf or half-caf coffee when you’re pregnant, but why risk drinking something cheap and widely available?

At least it probably tastes better than Third Trimester Tea.