The Worst Things For Sale

This $700+ bipedal robot links to Amazon Alexa and walks around your house recording video and audio. The manufacturer brags that “Lynx is always getting smarter,” which is definitely something you want and not the plot of a dystopian movie. But, hey, you can ask it what the weather is outside, and it’ll tell you, so it’s probably worth the money, loss of privacy, and its likely inclusion in the botnet that will comprise the AI that overtakes humans within the next 40 years.

Why own a stereo, coffee table, refrigerator, and USB charging cable when you could combine them all into one 116-pound coffee table? If that doesn’t sound like a slam-dunk to you, check out the price, or the reviews with details like “came damaged” and “breaks easily.”

From the makers of Did You Feed The Dog? comes Did You Medicate The Dog?

I… do too?

I didn’t know broccoli was up for debate.

Potassium iodide is available pharmaceutically, as supplements for hyperthyroidism, or for those who don’t get enough iodine in their diet. It’s also used to prevent damage to the thyroid gland when radiation is absorbed by the body, either as part of medical treatment, or an environmental release of radiation.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t treat Morgellons, a self-diagnosed skin condition which has been classified as delusional parasitosis by modern medicine. Those who claim to suffer from it pick and scratch their skin compulsively, leading fibers from their own clothing to be embedded in their skin, which they then use as proof that they’ve got Morgellons. Spurned by the medical establishment due to the fact that their condition isn’t medically treatable, they are then led by online quacks to buy tiny $40 packages of salt to “cure” their Morgellons.

Also, the manufacturer claims “There’s nothing in it for Big Pharma,” which, to me, makes them Little Pharma.

This onesie, meant for a baby as young as three months old, makes fun of the baby’s legs for being fat.

Why not spoil your baby with a silver rattle? It’s only a chunk over two hundred bucks, but compared to this silver hippopotamus intended for housewarming (????) it’s a bargain.