11 lbs of Nutella

Nutella is readily available in grocery stores across the country, so why you’d need eleven pounds of it in a single giant tub is anyone’s guess. Sure, it’s delicious, like any other combination of sugar and fat, but eleven pounds of Nutella has 27,000 calories. That’s two weeks’ worth of meals. Not two weeks of dinner, but two weeks of your entire caloric consumption, period.

It’s also worth noting that Nutella is only 13% hazelnuts and 7.4% cocoa. The majority of it is sugar and palm oil. If you want an authentic Italian hazelnut spread, Crema Alla Nocciola is 45% hazelnuts. It comes in a seven-ounce tub, too, so if you want to destroy your metabolism with it, you’ll have to suffer the indignity of manually entering a quantity of twenty-five tubs.