Obsidian Healing Orb

For the low price of $2012.00, you can have this obsidian healing orb. I don’t know why I didn’t buy one of these years ago. So much money for health insurance and doctor’s co-pays down the drain.

My main question here is who was manning the quality-control shift when this came through, and read the listing, and thought “Hmm, product features include repelling negative spirits? Okay, sounds legit to me.”

Product features also include “Chakras: All.” You know, so you can get rid of all those separate chakra orbs you’ve been keeping around.