When the 2000s began, and we could wear novelty glasses where the middle zeros were the glass-holes, and we could look through the zeroes, that was fine. It worked, and it was symbolic of last decade. Practical, but ultimately, empty.

Since 2010 came along, though, novelty manufacturers have been unable to conceive of another trope for new-year decorations, and have compromised by putting a hole in the 1, a digit which is defined as a thin vertical line. The digit in binary which represents the opposite of zero. It doesn’t work at all, yet we still do it.

And so, these glasses represent our ‘tytens, the meme decade, the years when the idea no longer works, but we keep cramming it on in there. Put a zero in that one. Keep beating that dead horse. And enjoy it while we’ve got it. The twenty-twenties are going to be so fucked up and shitty we’ll look back on these years with rose colored glasses.

Probably a pair with holes put through the twos in “2020”.

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Contact drew at drew@toothpastefordinner.com or tweet him @TWTFSale.