The Drum Machine Wallet

When you open Drum Machine Wallet, it plays one of five drum-machine beats through a tiny speaker. So there you’ll be, in a restaurant, at the grocery store, or just trying to dig out a dollar bill to get a soda, and horrible little mechanical sounds will play, causing everyone within earshot to turn and bore holes into your skull with their laser-eyes of irritation. Throw your fedora in the trash can, buddy, you’ve found a new way to make everyone hate you.