The Cellulite Vibrator

Cellulite is subcutaneous fat that clumps up under the skin of around 80% of adult women worldwide. Since this is a target market of around 2 billion people, there is no shortage of devices designed to reduce or remove the appearance of cellulite.

One of my favorites, though, is Celluless MD, a handheld device that looks like some kind of vibrator inside a breast pump attached to a Clarisonic brush. The manufacturer, beneath the picture of a girl who’s too young to accumulate cellulite in the first place, boasts that it’s “best for holiday parties.” I’ve never gone to a holiday party where I get handheld-vacuumed, but now I’m wondering what I’ve been missing all these years.

Well… only kinda wondering. The customers all say that it either arrived broken or broke immediately.