Fat Man In A Barrel


You’ve got to hand it to the makers of Fat Man In A Barrel, a humongous dildo I’ve pixellated for obvious reasons. (You can see it on the manufacturer’s listing, if you’ve got a need to do that.) Not just for making something so huge it’s unlikely many people would ever be able to use it, but for coming up with an innocuous name so un-dildo-like that still describes their dildo perfectly.

Notable for the exact opposite reason is Kaylen’s Hand Butt Plug, which is shaped, apparently, exactly like Kaylen’s hand. Whoever that may be. Hope you’re getting royalties from that hand-modeling job, Kaylen.

Baby Bitch


The “Baby On Board” signs, which first became popular in 1985, have finally been parodied. You’re only 30 years late, guys, and it’s also ambiguous as to whether the car is the bitch, or the mom is the bitch.

Not that I agree with calling anyone a bitch. It’s just imprecise.

Bioenergetic Homeopathic Imprinter


What is the Apex Bioenergetic Homeopathic Imprinter? Obviously, to you and me, it’s a medical scam being sold for over $500 to gullible people in search of a cure for their ailment. But the manufacturer says it “captures the body’s bioresonance” and causes a “healing response.” Which are definitely real things.

I strongly urge you to read the long, insane description they’ve provided themselves, since I don’t have the space for it here.

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