Share

Bioenergetic Homeopathic Imprinter

apex-bioenergetic-imprinter

What is the Apex Bioenergetic Homeopathic Imprinter? Obviously, to you and me, it’s a medical scam being sold for over $500 to gullible people in search of a cure for their ailment. But the manufacturer says it “captures the body’s bioresonance” and causes a “healing response.” Which are definitely real things.

I strongly urge you to read the long, insane description they’ve provided themselves, since I don’t have the space for it here.



Diseases Caused By Masturbation

diseases-caused-by-masturbation

You wouldn’t think that a discredited pseudo-scientific treatise from the 1700s would still be in print, but:

1. Here it is

2. Thousands of people online today abide by a doctrine they call “no fap,” claiming that abstinence from masturbation cures their social and physical illnesses.

There’s also “Images You Should Not Masturbate To,” though that’s a more recent book, whose cover appears to show a naked Ron Paul chopping through a frozen lake with an axe.



Sauna Mask

sauna-face-mask-1

This “sauna face mask” makes your face sweat, which supposedly causes it to become more firm. I don’t believe it, but more importantly, I wanted to show you these pictures.

sauna-face-mask-2

 

Day 3. They say we can remove the masks soon, but I’m not sure I believe them. I’m not sure what I believe at all, any more.

sauna-face-mask-3

 

Day 17. We’re all going to die here. It’s just a matter of time. Mask works well, though. Four out of five stars.

Dance Before The Police Come

dance-before-the-police-come

The music on “Dance Before The Police Come!” is about what you’d expect for a dance-music album from 1990, but the cover’s one of my favorites of all time: two oiled-up, shirtless men calling themselves “Shut Up And Dance” command you to dance. With swords. And a pair of nunchucks. And the police are definitely coming soon. It’s in the same league as, perhaps surpassing, “Big Bear: Doin Thangs.”









TWTFS is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for sites to earn advertising fees by advertising and linking to amazon.com. We are not affiliated with the manufacturers whose products appear on TWTFS.


Contact drew at drew@toothpastefordinner.com or tweet him @TWTFSale.