Tightens Vagina Expert


If you didn’t read Chinese, you might not know, at first glance, that this box holds a product whose translated name is “Tightens Vagina Expert.”

You might also not realize that the ingredients list is as follows: top soybean extract, collagen, albizia julibrissin durazz, galla chinensis, psoralea corylifolia, incaryillea sinemsis lam, morinda umbellate, cortext eucommiae, pericarpium granati, rhizome curcumae longae, and so on.

It actually says “and so on” at the end of the ingredients. I think they got to a certain point and just said “Fuck it, it’s full of a bunch of weird shit, you don’t know what it is and you don’t care if you’re eating a mystery pill to tighten vagina expert.”

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Contact drew at drew@toothpastefordinner.com or tweet him @TWTFSale.