Kohalon is a performance artist in the manner of YouTube, performing extremely low-grade stunts in a unitard for nothing more than attention. You can watch “Guess the cheese with death sauce”, as it seems as good as any other entry point to his body of work, or you can browse all the Kohalon videos in case “Prank Ate the pie which tarantula in it” or “Pooped on reflexology mat” is more of what you’re looking for.

Beam is a projector that fits into a lightbulb socket and works as a projector for your phone. It might make sense at $40-50, but not at this insane price. You could get a mini projector that does the same thing for $58, or, for that matter, a 32″ TV for $168.

One of the features the manufacturer lists is that you can “also use Beam as a regular light.” You could tie steaks to your feet and use them as flip-flops, but it’s probably not worth listing as a feature of steak.

“Ah, an allegory that uses animals to warn of the dangers of fascism!” you might think, reading the title The Furred Reich. Nope, it’s just your regular Nazi beastiality book where a dude fucks a leopard who is in the SS. (You can Look Inside to read an excerpt, if you must.)

(Edit: The book has been removed.)

What is more depressing than cooking a single egg in a tiny, four-inch frying pan? I’d say it’s a tie between Microwave For One, a cookbook printed in 1987, and A Man, A Can, A Microwave, which somehow was coauthored by the editors of Men’s Health. If you’re feeling depressy (or want to bring down your good mood) you can hit the “Look Inside” link on the last one to read a microwaved steak recipe.

A bonsai tree is a work of contemplative skill, requiring decades of careful watering, patient shaping, and attentive maintenance. So it only stands to bear that you can buy a fake bonsai, to give you the look of such an endeavor with no effort.

This is an “upright chair”, which gives the observer the effect that you’re propping yourself up on a stick you’ve shoved up your ass. It’s also only a chair in the loosest definition of the word “chair.”

This is a bottle of penis-enlargement oil. I probably don’t have to explain to you why that’s not something that’s real, but I did want to show you the manufacturer’s picture of the bottle. Of course, the name of the similar product Semenoid is way better, but, hey, Semenoid doesn’t have ripped guns.