Monthly Archives: October 2016

Kohalon: Guess The Cheese


Kohalon is a performance artist in the manner of YouTube, performing extremely low-grade stunts in a unitard for nothing more than attention. You can watch “Guess the cheese with death sauce”, as it seems as good as any other entry point to his body of work, or you can browse all the Kohalon videos in case “Prank Ate the pie which tarantula in it” or “Pooped on reflexology mat” is more of what you’re looking for.

The Light Bulb Projector


Beam is a projector that fits into a lightbulb socket and works as a projector for your phone. It might make sense at $40-50, but not at this insane price. You could get a mini projector that does the same thing for $58, or, for that matter, a 32″ TV for $168.

One of the features the manufacturer lists is that you can “also use Beam as a regular light.” You could tie steaks to your feet and use them as flip-flops, but it’s probably not worth listing as a feature of steak.

Cooking For Depressed People


What is more depressing than cooking a single egg in a tiny, four-inch frying pan? I’d say it’s a tie between Microwave For One, a cookbook printed in 1987, and A Man, A Can, A Microwave, which somehow was coauthored by the editors of Men’s Health. If you’re feeling depressy (or want to bring down your good mood) you can hit the “Look Inside” link on the last one to read a microwaved steak recipe.

Nonsai Tree


A bonsai tree is a work of contemplative skill, requiring decades of careful watering, patient shaping, and attentive maintenance. So it only stands to bear that you can buy a fake bonsai, to give you the look of such an endeavor with no effort.

A Stick Up Your Ass


This is an “upright chair”, which gives the observer the effect that you’re propping yourself up on a stick you’ve shoved up your ass. It’s also only a chair in the loosest definition of the word “chair.”

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