This key allows you to “kill” a lock by inserting and turning it. The manufacturer claims that it’s for landlords, but given that their other products are sneezing powder, stink bombs, stain-powder, and powdered capiscum, it’s clear this is meant to be used as a “prank.” Not a prank where someone is fooled and then everyone laughs, but the kind of prank where you ruin someone’s day and don’t tell them who did it.

Anyway, some guy bought one and used it on his own house, so enjoy his one-star review of what happened next.

Your dog will eat Puppy Cake’s just-add-water Dog Cheesecake. He’ll also eat any food ever made, and grass from the yard, and poop from the yard. So if you spend your afternon whipping him up a Red Velvet Puppy Cake, and he eats it, it’s not because he’s been craving the taste of red food coloring. It’s because he knows anything you set on the floor is his, and you just set an entire weird little cake down there.

It’s not that setting up a flaming pile of skulls in your yard wouldn’t be the most bad-assed thing to ever happen to your yard. It’s just that they’re sold individually, so if you want the full “pile of skulls” effect, it’ll run you several hundred dollars. (The manufacturer recommends you use nine to fifteen skulls.)

This LED light fits inside the neck of a bottle, and could be used with most wine or liquor bottles. The question of why you’d want a Southern Comfort lamp, on the other hand, has not been answered.

Yes, a “digital canvas” is just a television hung sideways.

Yes, it costs way more than a television.

According to the makers of this shirt, at least, who also made this weirdly hostile anti-fat shirt and this inscrutable combination of two or two and a half different ideas.

The Himalayan Pink Salt Kit is a small rock of pink salt and a grater, for what doesn’t seem like an outrageous price, until you realize you can get FIVE POUNDS of the same salt for six bucks.