Monthly Archives: October 2018

Dead Internet: The LOLcat Bible

lolcat-bible

You may be disappointed that Big Meme has colonized the funny side of the internet, but if you want a glimpse of hope for the future, take a moment to reflect on the fact that people don’t send “LOL Cats” around anymore. And the books they spawned are now worth a hot penny. Literally one cent.

Not just the LOL Cat Bible, either. “How To Take Over Teh Wurld: A Lolcat Guide 2 Winning” is on sale for $0.01. “I Can Has Cheezburger: A Lolcat Colleckshun” is also a penny. So is “How 2 Be Awsum: A Lolcat Guide 2 Life.”

We did it. We stomped a bad internet turd down into the shower drain. Corn and all, it’s consigned to the sewer of history, covers ripped off and returned to the publisher with extreme prejudice. Sure, the paper will be dissolved and recycled into the next book made out of a website, but for one fleeting moment, we were victorious over a corporate attempt to commodify humor.

The Worst Possible Album About Dogs

anthems-for-dogs

I checked out “Anthems For Dogs Only” because I thought it was going to be an album of music you play for your dog. It’s not. It’s an album about having sex with dogs. While it’s hard to understand this guy’s bizarre speak-singing, in “Shut The Fuck Up” he brags, “My raps are better because of my bestiality experiences.”

And it’s not just a concept album – his second album “Damaged & Ruined” contains the tracks “Husky Cock” and “Everyone Should’ve Done Beastiality”, and his debut “Shoktro” contains the terms-of-service defying song “The Instructional Guide To Having Sex With Huskies,” where he insists that you find a romantic room before you begin the physical process of readying your dog for non-consensual intercourse.






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Contact drew at drew@toothpastefordinner.com or tweet him @TWTFSale.