HAHAhah poopy water

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“Look! I drink poopy water!” the grocery-store shift manager said, after all the employees had assembled in his office. He lifted his toilet-bowl mug and giggled. “Ha! Ha! Not poop! Just coffee!”

Across town, at the co-op, the manager at the organic-foods store went from one name-tagged teenager to the next. “You recycle this?” he said, shoving a recycling-bin-shaped coffee mug in one face after another. Laughing, he said “No! Don’t recycle brown poopy water! Just plastic and paper!”

Meanwhile, in an empty house, a cat lapped forlornly from the toilet-bowl-shaped pet-water receptacle. “I can’t believe they degrade me like this,” he thought, flicking his tongue expertly to pull water into his mouth using a combination of fluid dynamics and surface tension. “All I want is some dignity.”






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Contact drew at drew@toothpastefordinner.com or tweet him @TWTFSale.