Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazon, went on 60 Minutes tonight to describe Amazon Prime Air, a service that flies your Amazon Prime purchases straight to your house with tiny, unmanned helicopters. FAA willing, it will go into operation in 2015. I look forward to a future where petty criminals steal my Cyber Monday deals out of the air with big nets.

I used to have a coworker who would tap his pencils. Not while he was thinking, because he was never thinking, but for hours, for fun. These drumstick pencils are just encouraging others like him to continue with their tapping. Tap tap tap tap tap. It’s morse code for “you hate working here.” Tap tap tap.

The only thing worse would be a desk toy that makes drum sounds with a tinny speaker. Of course, such a terrible thing exists, and I hope that your local pencil-drummer doesn’t read this, or he’ll have it overnighted to work so he can play it as soon as possible.

These heart-print panties fit on your iPhone. For some reason.