Monthly Archives: January 2014

Saffron extract: Dr. Oz Strikes Again


Saffron is, biologically speaking, the dried stigmas of the crocus flower. It’s orange in color and used culinarily for its color and scent. It contains small amounts of terpenes and other organic compounds (like safranal) which are weak antioxidants and mild anticonvulsants, but as you might imagine, saffron extract does not cause a person’s appetite to be diminished. Nor does it cause thermogenesis (the most common pharmaceutical method of weight-loss.)

Like many of the supplement fads of the past few years, it was pushed by Dr. Oz, a television doctor who is paid by supplement companies to promote their products. Dr. Oz has also been directly responsible for the Garcinia Cambogia fad/scam, promoting it heavily in 2012 despite widespread scientific studies showing it has no appetite-suppression or thermogenesis-promoting properties.

Before garcinia, Dr. Oz promoted green coffee-bean extract and raspberry ketones as weight-loss supplements. No peer-reviewed study has proven that either of these supplements induce weight loss, either.

Given the fact that Dr. Oz has a history of promoting homeopathy in addition to one weight-loss scam after another, it only stands to reason that he just last month published a book called “You: The Owner’s Manual,” a book that tells you how to be healthier and younger. It’s a #1 New York Times bestseller. It has sold over a million copies.


GPS tracker for a car


This $43 GPS tracker apparently works just fine, but now you are aware that anyone who has $40 to spare can monitor where your car is at all times, and, if they’re able to pop your hood to do a full install, they can cut your car’s power remotely at any time. Not creepy at all.

The Accomodator


The Original Accomodator is a dildo attached to a head-strap so you can wear the dildo on your chin. I have pixellated it in case you’re not in the mood to see such a thing, but there are several pictures on the product listing if you want to get Accomodated.

Bizarrely, there is a SECOND product called The Accomodator, which I guess is why the first one called itself The Original Accomodator. The non-original Accomodator also has a dildo, and a strap, but to use it, you… well… maybe it’s best if you just go see the incredibly not-safe-for-work picture and description of it.

Family Sleeping Bag


I love my family. But I don’t want to try to sleep all night inside a big insulated plastic bag with them. The manufacturer claims it fits four “if you have young children”, which may be technically true, but I dare you to stay asleep in a padded sweatbag with a five-year-old pushing her knees into the small of your back and sleep-talking about Dinosaur Train.

The Parents’ Guide To Popular Culture


This book came out in 2011. Pictured on its cover is the Myspace logo, Scooby Doo, a Logitech webcam, Mickey Mouse, an old cellphone, and “The Thinker,” among other things. This would be funny as a statement about how parents will never understand the media the next generation consumes, but, no, it’s sincere, and it also quotes Hall And Oates and Little Richard when talking about “contemporary music.” 

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