Spit On The Flag

mudjug-flag

It’s always seemed strange to me that the people who are most obsessed with American patriotism, and the American flag, purchase products like this spittoon. But, hey… If you want to spit directly onto the American flag, you can do that. You want to wipe your feet on the American flag as a doormat? Be my guest. Put an American flag vibrator on your hotdog, or your hotdog bun, or your b-hole? Go for it. This is your country too, even if you disrespect the flag.

Robot Boss

telepresence-robot

The new iPad Telepresence Robot lets you mount an iPad to a pair of wheels so you can silently scoot around your office while you’re working from home, chatting up your coworkers, or perhaps silently spying on them as they fritter your corporate profits away on Twitter.

For the boss who’s cheap enough to skip the pretense of the “social” part of remotely spying on his coworkers, the Appbot Link accomplishes the same thing for a tenth of the price, and features a camera closer to the floor, for added stealth. You can even recline the camera angle for upskirt shots, not that a shitty boss would ever demean his female employees by trying to do such a thing!






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Contact drew at drew@toothpastefordinner.com or tweet him @TWTFSale.