Robot Boss

telepresence-robot

The new iPad Telepresence Robot lets you mount an iPad to a pair of wheels so you can silently scoot around your office while you’re working from home, chatting up your coworkers, or perhaps silently spying on them as they fritter your corporate profits away on Twitter.

For the boss who’s cheap enough to skip the pretense of the “social” part of remotely spying on his coworkers, the Appbot Link accomplishes the same thing for a tenth of the price, and features a camera closer to the floor, for added stealth. You can even recline the camera angle for upskirt shots, not that a shitty boss would ever demean his female employees by trying to do such a thing!



Shotgunning A Beer

shotgun-champ-how-to-shotgun-a-beer

The Shotgun Champ, a product you can purchase, is not how you shotgun a beer. You punch a hole in the side of the can with literally any metal object, then pop the top and drink the foul brew through the hole in the side. I don’t personally endorse the idea, but if it’s something you want to do for personal reasons, you should at least do it in a way that doesn’t involve purchasing a shitty piece of plastic.

But at least it’s not a BottleBong, whose functionality can be replicated with a bendy-straw.



The Weird Uncle You Work With

le-tooter-realistic-fart-sounds

Who likes to fake-fart? To make a long story short: children, and also the Weird Uncle character you have at work. Le Tooter is for the hard-core fartfucker, whose use of Fart Machine was unsatisfactory, and found Fart Machine #2 to be more realistic, yet still not tooty enough to be convincing. A spritz of Liquid Ass, the fecal smell-spray, completes the Weird Office Uncle package.








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Contact drew at drew@toothpastefordinner.com or tweet him @TWTFSale.