Monthly Archives: December 2014

Retardead: Special-education zombies


The movie “Retardead” is about a group of intellectually-disabled young adults who are turned into zombies. When turning someone’s disability into a joke, it’s necessary to tread carefully, which, as you can tell by the tagline “They’re Not So Special Anymore,” the writers and directors failed to do. And, bizarrely, it’s not the first movie that did this. It’s a ripoff of the 2007 movie “Special Dead,” which, if you’ve got to rank horror movies that make fun of the disabled, is only slightly better than “Retardead.”

“Retardead” is by the makers of “Monsturd,” a movie described by one reviewer as “makes Sharknado look like Citizen Kane.”

Cards Against Hilarity


You’re no doubt familiar with Cards Against Humanity (now in its 6th iteration.) It’s the popular card game that allows you to say things like “Shitting midgets ate my grandma’s corpse” or “Hitler”  in an open-ended comedy-game format. But as the free market allows games like this to thrive, it also mercilessly continues to fill out the niche with imitators. Look at Cads About Matrimony, a marriage-themed ripoff of the Cards Against Humanity format. Or Crabs Adjust Humidity, a “raunchier” version of the original. The latter has been so popular (i.e. profitable) that it’s got four different boxes’ worth of cards. Imitation is the sincerest, and most lucrative, form of flattery.

EDIT: My buddy @cheesegod69 just showed me another one: “Cards For The Masses.”

Foodie Dice

foodie-diceIf you want to let Foodie Dice determine what hip combination of ingredients you should use in your next meal, then go for it. But for my money, the hottest foodie dice you can roll is going to one of your city’s food trucks. Will your artisanally-brilled dog dick give you salmonella? Will it cost $14 or will you luck out and pay only $11? Will you have to wait 30 minutes, or will you get it in a jiffy?

(A jiffy is a food truck term for 22 minutes.)

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