Monthly Archives: May 2015

Fat Man In A Barrel

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You’ve got to hand it to the makers of Fat Man In A Barrel, a humongous dildo I’ve pixellated for obvious reasons. (You can see it on the manufacturer’s listing, if you’ve got a need to do that.) Not just for making something so huge it’s unlikely many people would ever be able to use it, but for coming up with an innocuous name so un-dildo-like that still describes their dildo perfectly.

Notable for the exact opposite reason is Kaylen’s Hand Butt Plug, which is shaped, apparently, exactly like Kaylen’s hand. Whoever that may be. Hope you’re getting royalties from that hand-modeling job, Kaylen.

The Lime Bomber

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No, not a reclusive shack-dweller who plants explosives in fruit! That would actually be interesting! This is a $13 piece of plastic that puts a slice of lime into a bottle of beer.

And, nope, it doesn’t slice the lime. You have to slice the lime yourself. The only thing the Lime Bomber does is push the lime into the bottle. The supposed benefit? “Easier than putting the slice of lime into your bottle using your fingers.” That’s it.



Baby Bitch

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The “Baby On Board” signs, which first became popular in 1985, have finally been parodied. You’re only 30 years late, guys, and it’s also ambiguous as to whether the car is the bitch, or the mom is the bitch.

Not that I agree with calling anyone a bitch. It’s just imprecise.






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Contact drew at drew@toothpastefordinner.com or tweet him @TWTFSale.