Iced Coffee Maker


This $230 device makes cold-brew coffee. So does a plastic bucket. You put ground coffee in the bucket, pour cold water in, and leave the bucket in the fridge for 24 hours. Then pour it through a coffee filter into a pitcher. There, I just saved you $230.

Cereal Milk


“Cow Wow Cereal Milk” costs $2 for an 8-ounce serving, and is designed to taste like the milk that’s left in the bottom of a cereal bowl after the cereal is gone. This is accomplished by adding sugar and artificial flavoring to the milk.

You might wonder why the manufacturer is able to label artificially-flavored sugarmilk as “organic.” The reason for this is that labeling guidelines for organic food are so loose that unless it was genetically engineered or bombarded with radiation, it still counts as organic, as far as the USDA is concerned.

Snappy Butter Burst Oil


This is a gallon of butter-flavored oil, which looks to be the same kind that’s used at the movies. What caught my eye was the reviewer who said “Have had it about 6 weeks and time to order more.”

A gallon of vegetable oil contains 30,000 calories. That means that this reviewer is either consuming 700 calories of oil daily, or 4200 calories (in one “movie night” sitting) every week.

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