Furniture Straps

furniture-lifting-straps

These straps allow you to lift up furniture and carry it on your back. For some reason, though, the manufacturer shows a man using this who has had his head replaced (or is badly ill.) Check out the first and fourth pics in their gallery.



Help The Worst Things For Sale continue.

drew-deer

Hey, it’s me, Drew. There are around 20,000 readers of The Worst Things For Sale, but only a tiny fraction of you guys are supporters of our Patreon, which is the only significant source of funding for The Worst Things For Sale. A pledge of $0.10 a day would help to keep TWTFS updated 365 days a year. I hate to ask you guys for stuff, because I know you’re just here to read about shitty products and not buy them, but I really do need your help.

Please contribute to my Patreon page, and I can keep writing TWTFS as well as my comics. There are higher pledge levels, but $3 a month ($0.10 a day) would be fantastic. Thanks for reading, and for helping me continue this work for everyone who reads and enjoys it.

Mommee Coffee

mommee-coffee

Pregnant women are one of the most coveted demographics for capitalists. You will ruin your child’s entire life forever if you don’t buy the right products while pregnant, and there’s no better driver of commerce than fear. Enter Mommee Coffee, the pregnant woman’s coffee. Sure, you could drink regular decaf or half-caf coffee when you’re pregnant, but why risk drinking something cheap and widely available?

At least it probably tastes better than Third Trimester Tea.

Urban Spork

lewis-and-clark-spork

The Lewis N. Clark Urban Gear Spork is a stainless-steel folding spork. The lone review sadly points out that the spoon is too large, the tines of the fork are too rounded to pick up food, and the “knife” is a few serrations carved into the side of the spoon. Perhaps feeling sorry for the urban spork, they then gave it three stars.

The Stainless Steel Tactical Spork, a different product, isn’t much better, but it does come with a picture of the spork attached to the end of an assault rifle.






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Contact drew at drew@toothpastefordinner.com or tweet him @TWTFSale.